Playing the victim

We all play the victim from time to time. It feeds the ego and allows us to feel like our worth is more than someone else. It makes us feel superior to others because we are going through more than anyone else. Our cross to bear is bigger..........our plight is worse......blah, blah, blah.
I'll get back to that in a minute.
The past few days have been wonderful for me. It has been a weekend full of wonderful moments! On last Saturday, Tom and I were invited to a wedding celebration for some friends and we had a blast! And then on Sunday we re-connected with some old friends that have moved back to NC from California. It was so great to see them and as far as I'm concerned you can NEVER have too many friends. Especially the ones you love so much. And then yesterday Tom and I went to a Van Halen concert in Raleigh and had such great seats! I have never sat that close to the stage before! It was awesome!
So, back to my other thoughts. I am a bit discombobulated (sp?) and women do not think linearly, anyway. So, I was lying on the table the other day getting my radiation treatment and all of a sudden my mind took me into the victim mode. It was as if I just realized where I was and what I was doing. I thought to myself, "I have cancer and I'm here having to go through this." And I immediately realized that it was my ego. So I became present again and it went away. I am not a victim. I am not someone who cancer happened to. I am not defined by this disease. I AM. This moment happened and I have become friends with it. My friend said the other day that she was riding one of her horses one day and it was a beautiful day and she thought, "This is a perfect day." And then she quickly realized that there are NO perfect days - there are only perfect moments. And actually only one moment - NOW - this moment. I have had more perfect moments since I have started becoming aware than I ever have had in my life. It is so simple. Where have I been before this? Why has it taken me 45 years to figure this out? I almost feel like I have been living in "sleep mode" and I have just woken up. And it is GREAT to finally be conscious!