2 years ago today

It was 2 years ago today that I was told I had breast cancer. I remember sitting in the waiting room with my husband waiting for this doctor to tell me what I knew to be true. That I was perfectly fine. I knew it with my whole heart that I would walk out of there with good news. Tom told me later that he had watched the nurse at the front desk look at a chart and then look at me with dread in her eyes. He knew then that I was sick. Once the doctor told me I had cancer I think I thought at first that I must be in a dream. It didn't feel real. It couldn't be me. I felt fine. My body had not turned on me in that way. Thankfully, Tom was there to listen and ask questions and then we left. On the way to the car Tom held my hand and I asked, "Did he just tell me that I have breast cancer?" And Tom just turned and hugged me. I felt bad for him because I knew that he would want to "fix it" but this time he couldn't.
That day I felt helpless and strong all at the same time. Sounds weird, doesn't it? I knew that cancer had gotten me but I felt sure that it wouldn't beat me. That was the beginning of my journey and there were times that I felt like maybe it would beat me. But those times would pass and I would feel strong again.
What do you do on a day like today? Do you celebrate for having made it through the journey? Do you mourn for the time lost when you felt bad and helpless? Do you feel angry because it happened? Or do you embrace the fact that it did happen and nothing can change it?
I think that I will embrace it as a part of my life that happened. "Each place along the way is somewhere you had to be in order to be here." And I totally agree.